Onboard Amtrak Train # 30

Hmmm... there is always something exotic and pleasing about the trains that I miss on the faster, luxurious airliners. I started this journey with a lot of anxiety and skepticism, so much so, that the excitement of spending a week ahead with a good old friend was dampened by the thought of spending a whole night on an easy chair in the train. Saving some precious dollars was a priority but the air ticket price was obscene.

My co-passenger is a nice African American lady who is a graduate student in psychology at the Loyola University, Chicago. Being a student of human psyche, she is very polite and hospitable but at the same time, very busy with her cute Dell net book all through the journey. So the time pass started with Anton Chekov. Its amazing, the way he started his story about four travellers in the Russian Steppes back in 1888 or so and is still able to evoke interest in this 21st century traveller about the ordeal and adventures of those Russians. He repeatedly describes the minutae of landscape and the subtle details of the demeanor of his characters in the hundred pages short story :), just like I see the ordinary details of this American countryside over and over again. Somehow, I find both the exaggerations quite interesting. Probably, trains force you to touch and observe these finer points of human and environmental characteristics.

I am amazed to see/explore this American countryside as its a respite from the overwhelming skyscrapers of downtown Chicago. Its much like planet Earth :), not much different from any of my long Indian train journeys. Infact, the landscape is exactly the same. Countryside shops and residences are quite humble as against the luxurious downtown apartments at Chicago. One eccentricity is the large presence of make shift homes, I guess they call them 'Caravans'. They are parked right in the middle of trees in bunches of a dozen or so. They have mobile bathrooms and then there are clothlines supported on the trees. Occasionally, I find a solitary nomadic Caravan parked in the middle of nowhere, like say, a forest along the river. He seems to have become disillusioned with even his fellow nomads. Seeing anything such, I wonder, just like Chekov Sir does, at the pupose and ordeal of a lone poplar tree planted strangely in the middle of the harsh Russian Steppes. But I understand that the gypsy is human, and so he is fickle, and so he is mobile, and hence is better off than the lone poplar tree.

Trains give you ample time to listen to people as they share their experiences and delve into their past with totaly unknown co passengers. Isn't it something quite inherent to being human, but this capacity gets overwhelmed and almost defeated in the modern societal nitty gritties. I always find these talks quite interesting. Here, at this cafe, aboard Amtrak train # 30, I have a couple of undergraduate students who met onboard and are quite excited to know that they are from the same university. There is a grey haired talkative writer who is very excited about his new book on Nuclear Disarmament, titled "Apocalypse Never". There are a couple of Mexican American kids playing around and they have no idea nor botheration if they are going to Chicago or Washington DC. There is an old lady from West Viginia communicating fondly, to the undergrad students, her experinces and then there's a bespeckled cafe manager who is eager to strike a conversation with all his clients. As he does a good job, I occupy a table here, over hearing conversations and looking at the head of my train as it rushes towards Washington DC.

Raj and Tia...

..."Lets go out...", suggests Raj as he points at Swami's car. "At this hour !! Are you nuts !", Tia smiles as she looks at the car. "C'm on...", says Raj as he garbs the keys and pulls Tia towards the door. "What if some one wakes up..." complains Tia as she hurriedly puts on her footwear. "Here, I am leaving a note for Swami...", says Raj. "This is not good." Tia, as she stealthily closes the door behind her.-----------------------------------------

Tia, is Raj's friend from Bombay and has come down South with her roommate, Nisha specially to meet him. The guests are put up at Raj's place for this four day trip. Raj and Swami have been taking the girls around the beautiful city for the last three days and the HDFC credit card is sponsoring this lavish tour and travels for Raj who does not know how much he exactly earns or shells out on music, drinking, fag and friends.

The engine shrieks and comes to life. The seemingly eternal darkness of this haunted locality is set aside by the piercing energy from the headlamps and Raj maneuvers carefully through his winding unmetalled street. As they hit the main road busy with the intercity transports at this late hour, this infidel of sorts offers a rare reverence to the beautiful church at the end of the street. The church is a special landmark for Raj as it is the 'adda' for his intellectual sessions with Swami late on the high Friday nights. This is where lots of brainstorming happens when the drunken engineers call it a day with a last smoke. Today, Raj is up to some thing special and has to do it without fag or drink. A sort of challenge of its own kind.

Raj is driving slow and smooth on the free roads washed by the first of the monsoon showers in the evening. Both the occupants of the vehicle seem to enjoy the sensuality and charm of the night as they go past one signal to another towards the sea shore. Tia is looking out of the open window as the glaring city lights race against them portraying a beautiful dream sequence, the only difference being that this dream is happening real big time in her life. Raj is beaming with the excitement of being with his special friend and steals a glance every now and then as Tia enjoys the sights outside the window.
The couple has been together, and enjoying the companionship since three years. They met during the company's training period and never lost touch since then. Friendship has graduated into love (well, its disputable which relation is higher, but still...) and Cupid has set the stage for admission of the beautiful emotion.

The shore is lonely at this unearthly hour in the buzzing small city. Raj parks the car besides a closed soft drink shack in the sand and the couple set out for a walk on the moonlit rocky shore. The mood is bright, exuberant and different, for Raj has not felt this special in a sober state, since a long time. The couple falls silent as they walk the shore towards a darker and beautiful stretch of rocks where the energy from the powerful halogen lamps fade away.

The roars of the Arabian sea provide a romantic background score. The sky is clear except a patch of distant lonely clouds on the eastern end who seem to have been traveling towards the other coast and have lost track of their joyous and prosperous caravan. This small collection of impregnated gases seem to be rocking to and fro, aimlessly, as if enjoying the beauty of the shore in the swing of the monsoon winds. Then there are, tender little white crabs, who have come out of sand and crevices to make love (I am not very sure though...) on the sand but these dangerous creatures are very shy of the human presence and clear the path for the couple at the very first sense.

Tia is anticipating a move from Raj who has kept quiet now for an unusually long time. This silence is slowly consuming Raj's confidence and pushing him deeper into the hole from where he has resolved to come out today and express his heart to his love. A sudden energy urges Raj to take Tia by her hand and do the necessary talk, instantly. He contemplates for a while and then finds himself weak again in the very next moment. In these couple of heart throbbing moments for Raj, Tia has taken a lead by a couple of steps towards the rocks to find a place where the couple may sit. A strange restless little baby cloud is pulling itself apart from the small family at the eastern sky. It seems to have been attracted to the beauty of the full moon. A fisherman is headed towards deeper waters to start his fishing business for the coming day. His canoe is spotted by the bleak light from his lamp. Meanwhile, Raj is feeling nervous and tries to reach for his fag. He gropes for his cigarette but realizes that he left them at the dashboard.

Raj gathers himself and quickly moves toward the rock where Tia has found a comfortable place. Being a woman, Tia is well aware of her friend's state of mind (well, they say that women have this sixth sense). “So...now that we have come here...is there some thing special...” utters Tia, with a mischievous inquisitive look (also, add a tiny bit of shyness to this mischief). In fact, she knows very well what's so special about this moment and is trying to stoke Raj so that he crosses the threshold and says what she is willing to hear. The stray baby cloud is traveling faster towards the moon.

Raj concentrates into a distant nowhere and turns to Tia in the next moment. He is still nervous but gains an immense strength as he locks an eye contact with his partner. Tia tries to roll her eyes off Raj but is helplessly very much into the affair. “Its hard to find a verbal expression for my thoughts...” says Raj, convincingly enough. “either I am bad at it or, language may undermine my feeling...” and he bends slightly towards Tia to kiss her. Tia endorses her friends' admission and covers her distance to kiss Raj. The restless baby cloud has now covered the ever resplendent moon and the fishing boat has been lost into some distance. The young couple enjoys this amateur contact and it soon graduates into a deeper kiss within a matter of seconds.

Soon, the playful baby cloud moves ahead and the moon now gleams bright over the couple suggesting a mischievously inquisitive worldly behavior. The couple stays at the shore till the light breaks in the eastern sky. The restless baby cloud has traveled more distance and probably forgotten its emotion for the moon for some other infatuation. It will pour down some day when it realizes its relation with the earth and the earth's longing for it, as Raj and Tia realize today for each other...

Swami...

One of the wise guys of my time recently told me, "You cannot force yourself, to pen down your thoughts. Instead, there will be thoughts that will force you to pen them down, before the heat of the moment is lost...". Mysteriously, today I feel the same curious energy that invigorates my new found infatuation with bloging and forces me to document this idea of youth, intensity and camaraderie. Being stupid and candid to The Readers, this plot does not have some sort of glamor or feminine quotient, in case you are getting any ideas. Still, it does represent the in dispensable value of passion and restlessness to living.

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It's a hurried Friday evening at the office of a big, services company in a buzzing Southern city. Swami is living the hell part of a software engineer's life cycle. He is new to a team of developers and working day and nights on a stupid computer program to format huge piles of seemingly dumb numbers. Proud of being a developer and part of a prestigious and arduous team for his client, this energetic lad has fast become the ideal team member for his aging manager. He has been allotted a corner cubicle in the huge Offshore Development Center, as if even the Gods don't wish to distract. Office people seldom get a chance to talk to this shy and relative recluse of sorts but they have started to identify him as a corner stone they would always find at the office. Leaving office at 6 is a luxury that Swami seriously wants to avail, at least as a change and today, is the chance. The company has arranged its annual function to honor its valued people at the 'Taj'.

Team leads and the Managers are (generally), the first ones to leave on such occasions. These are the policy makers, directors of the energies and above all, they are the experts on Microsoft Excel sheet program. With these qualifications, their responsibilities finish by 6:00 pm and the team members or the spot boys of software industry carry on the burdensome flame of glory, success and whatever the Indian IT industry stands for. Swami, is one such spot boy.

But the world is quite asymmetric and, there are certain spot boys(peers) who have a different approach to the words like hard work. They weigh smart work or the word, delegation more than the stupidity and innocence of hard work and responsibility. These are definitely the budding leaders ! (Well, even I am not very clear if I overstated that, but let it be so, as of now...)

Swami is working diligently on the testing of his code and despite repeated attempts, the client has rejected the output every time since the last one week. He wishes to put things in shape desperately and wants to fix up a few crucial bugs before leaving for the day. At 6 o' clock one of the client manager sends a mail detailing a new set of parameters on which the code has failed this time. Its a heart break ! He knows that his code doesn't work but as all sincere developers, he is confident in the power of technology and is sure that he will master it before the product launch. The problem is, the client doesn't buy it so easily !

The mail has blown away the courage to make any last ditch efforts for the day. Swami logs off and goes to the desks of a few friends who are left at the office. Ria, a sweet North Indian girl working in the adjacent team is still winding up. Swami steps into her cubicle, inclines against the wall and greets her affectionately, powered with an infinite joyous energy that flows only in the males across all species. Ria replies with a smile and quickly gets down to work. As she hurriedly explains over her final errands for the day, Swami enjoys the moment of seeing her, without her notice. Now, the females also have their strengths, in the sense they know 'when to make a correct move'. Ria looks up suddenly only to startle Swami out of his dreamy fantasies. And as he struggles back with his senses, she is looking mischievously into his eyes and subtly asks for a favor. The company transport has left for the hotel long back and she needs to go to the party. Well, the gentleman engineer is ready to offer her a ride to the hotel on his new bike. The day seems to be ending well all of a sudden and a beaming Swami starts off with Ria towards the lift.

Any civilized man has had to and will have to manipulate and meander through the mean world of our so-called civilized 'society' to reach his dreams. This 'society', is largely comprised of groups of homo sapiens who suffer from the stupid evil suspicion and irk that some one, some where is having a good time. But the irony is, that everyone contributes to such groups and suffers from one such group at the same time. Well, Neeraj and Rohit are awaiting the lift. Neeraj, is a rich local guy working with Swami and they both share an uneasy rivalry over a slew of interests ranging from onsite placement to girls in the office. They are an example of two perilously similar characters who find themselves helplessly competing for resources time and again. Neeraj has often shown interest in Ria and that irks Swami but today, its his chance to score points over his rival as he walks the corridors with the sweetest girl of the office. But sometimes, all that starts bright may not end well. As they come out of the building, Ria cries out,”Oh my God!! Its raaiiining ”, a typical girlish sensitive cosmetic noise. Swami is like “what the f**k!!” and as he makes this face of a stupid asshole in utter disgust and surprise, the rival gentleman engineer steps in to help the lady offering her a ride in his new car. Ria gives him an amazing instant cooked loving look and sets off as Neeraj offers her space in his umbrella to reach his car. “Bitch” utters Swami as turns to Rohit and says,”that Bastard could have offered me a lift as well, right ??” Swami and Rohit set off for the hotel on their bikes.

Sometimes, there are subtle facts that help describe and define characters. Swami never wears a rain coat. He does not want to look like an 'uncle ji' riding his bike wrapped in a plastic coat with a lunch box tied to the handle swinging like a pendulum. Hence, he prefers to get wet or wait. Accordingly, he makes it to The Taj in a soaked pair of jean and t-shirt. Dress code and all the etiquettes are meant for those who lead a superficial life but not for the young mavericks who enjoy and learn from their experiences.

Its already late and the award ceremony has ended. Engineers are now moving towards the food with the drinks in their hands. Most of the seniors seated themselves on the elegant chairs laid at the hotel lawn and are dining with all the corporate etiquettes whereas the young blood is trying to have a good time dancing. Swami finds a fellow and sits at one side of the bar along with the others. The excitement of being with Ria has died out by now. She is dancing with some one else but not Neeraj and is having a good time. The whole idea of being alone, overwhelmed with the responsibility of a huge project without the much needed support, the laxity that he sees in his leaders, the challenge to get ahead of his treacherous peers who know the smart ways out of any impasse, the disgust of slogging on weekends to catch up with deadlines, fills his mind with a noise. This noise faints his worldly vision and burdens his senses into a dreamy world where he is finding ways to break out. Its been more than 8 months at this city and he struggles for a social life and friends. He wishes to reach out someone special or common what so ever, just to talk.

The habit of drinking finds easy roots in such characters but Swami just realized that he left his wallet at his cubicle. “ Want a beer ? ” comes the voice of a savior. This is Raj, another of the sort of Swami in this IT jamboree. He works in the adjacent team and is equally pissed off with the system but has learnt to soak his soul in drink and smoke in a gaiety to avoid the world getting on his nerves. Swami and Raj have always respected each other's diligence and share the emotion what the world would say, naiveté. Today, they found a common platform, the bar, to celebrate this camaraderie. Kingfisher, the Indian king of good times proves effective enough for both to talk and puts a sense of ease on Swami's soul and mind.

Two bottles down, Swami gets confident enough to go to the floor and try to shake a leg with Ria. But as he reaches the center of the stage where the center of everyone's attraction is moving her slender figure, he feels the limelight and feels weak at his knees all of a sudden. The whole confidence that the great Mr. Mallaya brewed at United Breweries gives way to the humbleness of the character. He returns to the bar and passes on an innocent smile to Raj who comprehends the case and both of them burst into a laughter. Raj offers a fag either mischievously or, he understands that he is standing with a real partner. Swami's beer soaked frustrated soul cannot resist the temptation and grabs one. Raj lights the cigarette and as Swami coughs out the first smoke, he claims, “You shouldn't have taken it if you didn't try previously...” Both pass on a smile in a tacit understanding of the new found brotherhood, turn their chairs facing the crowd with couple of Kingfisher bottles on the table and share the cigarette counter as Swami says, ”Isn't she beautiful? ”. “Indeed ”, comes the reply...

The day has indeed ended well...

2009...a year for resolutions...

here comes another new year, and people are ecstatic, over joyed, enthusiastic and every thing, that represents anything new, refreshed, and rejuvenated. new year parties are over, people here(americans) are upbeat and welcome a new president with hope; hope to fight recession and bring a change towards a more tolerant society. back there at my home, where the life styles are humble and maverick (in some sense), people are hopeful to recover from the scars of terror and continue with their dream run(or struggle) towards prosperity. as far as the rest of the world is concerned, the euphoria is currently omnipresent and it brings about a hope (i know i exaggerated the usage) for a fresh start to tackle their failures, to give another try to the challenges of their lives and to be better off in the coming times.


this bird's nest view looks all pleasant and shows off the unique nature of homo sapiens that dwell this planet; the uniqueness of having a will power to exist and excel in our lives.lets try a closer and better view of their lives and talk today about the life of a lesser(by degree of art) fellow sapien and what he goes through at the first week of a brand new year. some of the audiences may find this particular case study a little dull, easy going or to simply put, an artless creature but yes, i admit, this creature does not represent the comprehensive view of the gracious and some times clever race of sapiens but some where he represents them all.



the novelty of time has had its pleasant effect on our subject. 2008 had been a successful year materially and personally. many goals were reached surprisingly, but among serious turmoils. aweful experiences moved his positions on numerous ideas and it happens with every individual. the morning after a dark stormy night is always the most desired and the most beautiful picture that a living soul contemplates. this hopeful fellow has a weird bent towards positivity that had been put to test in the dark night and this weird positivity makes him believe that the morning will be bright and shiny. with the hopes of peaceful breath for his fellows and all, he resolves never to doubt the power of good deed and faith in any of the future storms in his life.



some one said, 'failures and rejections make a Man out of you !' an implicit difference between the sapien sexes is that the males are always child at heart no matter how sturdy outlook they may sport, and females are ... they are the undefined !! Like Every Other Sapien, the subject has also had his own Unique experiences with love or crush or infatuation or lust. these are the feelings that make you always feel high as 180 mL of Royal Challenge whisky with 3 Wills Classic cigarettes would do. they make you feel ecstatic and pure but leave you(largely) dry and puzzled and possibly with a hangover. like every other Man (please mind the word), he wishes to get out his past hangovers and start a new innings with the lessons learnt. lessons learnt through experience, and proudly treasured by his own judgement of being a 'Man in the crowd'. ambitious resolution this seems, and indeed is !! being an amateur at heart and destined never to grow, he comprehends that these hangovers can only be replaced but never done away with. he also understands that being a Man(please mind the word) some things cannot be achieved but are destined. so, this is more of a desire for a partner that almost all of the sapiens fancy. simply put, this is a wish for an opposite who listens to you like no one else does...



each one of the instantiations of this great species is eager to grow and never do anything that makes them portrayed as 'stupid' among the fellows. this is basically a desire to be called, Grown Up. our lad, is weird, in here... aspiring this arrogant status puzzles him and he just wishes to manage his breakfast and bed nicely in the coming year, rest all is surprisingly automatically taken care of, always ! so, the larger aim of this lad is to maintain breakfast and bed but not to get mired in the worldly intricacies that complicate the life(now you know why I called him a lesser sapien). he resolves to laugh or put up at least a perplexing smile on his face whenever he is uneasy and is at the hub of stupidity or helplessness.

despite all these dull characteristics, this sapien justifies his class by having material ambitions. he wishes to fulfill his basic needs and thereafter, any milestone towards the goals are welcome achievements. as he is a growing young fellow, he needs to distinguish between needs and wants in the new year, he needs to pay heed to the fact that arroganc does not accompany success. arrogance is rather largely a lack of experiences that has the power to humble you. arrogance is necessary at times (not only because it sells for glamour), but then it is better called finesse or valor.

the subject is a dull lesser example of a greater species.his views and resolutions may not be omnipresent but they do represent a perspective of life and the beauty of life is, that it is a unique experience for every one in the crowd.